Let us each walk our own individual paths.

I have been watching from a far lately, and as always, this has led me to do a bit of thinking – this time it is not that type of over thinking that ends up making problems that are not there.

Of recent times, I have constantly been presented with people giving opinions on how others live, or choices they make in life.

And you know what?

I’m a bit over it.

I am not going to sit here and pretend I am all high and mighty and that I have never done the same, but I do realize that is is pretty dumb.

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More often I am heard uttering the words “Different Strokes for Different Folks” and each time I say or think those words, I realize how true they really are.

It goes without saying that each and every one of us has a different path in life, with different goals, things we hold important and different ideals on how to live life the way we want to as individuals, or as a family group.

For the last few months I have been on the receiving end of these stupid questions and moments of people just not getting me, but deciding that they wont give up until I prove my views or decisions to them.

And you know what?

I don’t have to do that.

Yes we purchased a business, and yes we work many hours.

Yes it is hard, and right now life is a bit of an extreme juggling routine, that sometimes gets rather stressful.

Yes it means in school holidays they kids have frequented vacation care, and yes it would be awesome to take time off and just hang with friends over the holidays, but new businesses don’t work unless you do.

Yes money is tight when starting out, but our Profit and Loss margin is none of your bloody business.

Yes I am enjoying working for myself, and getting out in the sunshine daily, but no I am unable to guarantee you that this is what I will be doing for the rest of my life – right now that is of no importance to you or me.

Perhaps you think our families choice in life is not the right one, but we are not asking your opinion.

Yes I am a tad crazy to add a Business Course into an already tight mix, and perhaps doing my assignments at 11:30 pm, was not the wisest idea – I worked that one out when I proof read them in the light of day.

Yes I am tired and not quiet there when it comes to finally catching up with you and I am the first to admit I am a bit of a bore to be around at the moment, when the exhaustion kicks in, my usual chatty self shuts down.

No it does not mean that I do not value our friendship, or that I do not want to be around you.

It does mean that I am wanting to just chill with my little family and soak up some time with us all four together.

Yes, you probably are right that I should get a second job.

Paying the bills has been rather tight with a new business.

You know what though? If and when I do that, it is up to me.

No, we are not having any more kids, we love our two children and are happy with our family unit of 4. Even before becoming parents, we always pictured ourselves with two.

That does not mean if someone chooses to have 8 kids (or none)  that their choice is wrong.

Wow, I  really am blabbering here again, but my message is rather simple.

Let’s stop judging each other and our choices in life.

Just because someone else is doing something that you perhaps would not choose to do yourself.

IT DOES NOT MEAN IT IS WRONG!

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Chances are that person is judging themselves way more harshly then you ever will, and regardless, life is one huge wonderful challenge as it is, we really should be here to help each other out, not bring each other down with petty comments or judgments.

So I have made a decision, it is a pretty simple one.

Let us each walk our own individual paths.

We all have different ideals and goals in life. We all make different choices, and while I may not understand some that others make, as long as their life choices and pathways do not harm others, as long as they are happy with their choices, then I need to be happy for them.

Stop the judgment people.

Imagine how boring life would be if we all lived it exactly the  same?

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Oh what a night

I went to bed at half past ten, ready to go to sleep.

All was quiet within the house, there was not even a peep.

Then the cat disturbed the calm, deciding the furniture needing wrecking.

I jumped out of bed and asked it to stop.

But it continued on it’s pecking.

Three times more I attempted to sleep.

Three times more the cat woke me.

Finally I covered the lounge with sheets

Hoping it would keep it scratch free.

Finally back in bed, my head hitting the pillow.

All of a sudden, a loud noise made me jump

When my little girl bellowed.

Up I ran into her room, to see what was the matter.

She was uncomfortable, and restless, waking with a clatter.

I lay in her bed to calm her down, and help her drift back to sleep.

Finally she was in snooze land again, after counting sheep.

Back to my bed I slowly crept, hoping for some rest.

Little did I know, there would be another little pest.

Little boy had a nightmare, waking with a fright.

He ran into our room, and boy what a sight!

He high jumped over his Dad, and landed right on me.

Snuggled up, and calm at last, he went back to the land of Zzzzzz’s

Finally

I thought I would get some rest, finally I would drift off to sleep.

Then pussy cat decided to jump up and lay on me.

“Oh what the heck” I thought

Let her lay there peacefully.

Then once again as I drift off, I wake up with a smack.

Little boy has accidently rolled on top of the cat.

I move them round and fix them up, and snuggle back in bed.

Then suddenly I feel a tap upon my head.

It was Miss 7, tired and upset.

For it was the bed she wet.

By now I was hanging over the side, son under one arm,

Cat under the other, not making a peep.

But I had to get up and change some sheets.

Into the laundry they were seen

On their way to become clean.

Dog was laying on the outside laundry floor.

Looking confused as she raised her paw.

She looked so comfy, I was tempted to just lay down and join her on the floor.

Time to get the cot mattress out of its plastic from under the bed.

She could not pull it out as the Foster cat was using it to lay her head.

The crinkles woke the cat with an awful fright,

She jumped on the bed, and jumped so high it was almost out of sight.

Finally, as the night became day,

Little girl became comfy in her own little way.

Cat had other ideas and begun to play.

With the crinkly plastic,

In a very loud way.

By this stage I decided even a marching band

Would not interrupt my own sleep plan.

After many hours of little sleep.

I finally got to get some zzzz’s

Then hubby’s alarm clock wakes with a squeal.

He groans that he is tired, and to get up is an ordeal.

I roll over and say.

“What a night”

He looks confused, I know I look a fright.

You see, while I had to fight for sleep.

While I had adventures when I did not want to hear another peep.

Dear Hubby lay on his side of the bed.

His pillow never left his head.

Low snores could be heard from him.

He never once woke despite of the din.

Time for him to get the van ready for work.

I bounded out for my own little perk.

As he prepared the coffee machine ready for the day.

I requested a coffee I would not have to pay.

He asked me what it was I would like.

Cappuccino, latte or flat white.

Sugar, how many?

He politely asked.

My answer was in my sleep deprived mask.

“Just give me coffee please, don’t ask”

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Don’t Presume

As I sit here on a Friday evening, flitting between office work, laminating new price tags and getting myself organized for an early start for work tomorrow, I cannot seem to shake of this icky feeling that has been creeping up all day.

Hundreds of fellow franchise partners are currently kicking back in the middle of Australia, enjoying all that Uluru has to offer a the annual National conference.

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The day has been full of photos of the rock, of camel rides around the rock, of games and goody bags, of limousine rides from the airport and cocktails by the pool.

Right now they will be dining at a gorgeous outdoor buffet, and tomorrow will be once again filled to the brim with activities, and a formal Gala dinner.

But we are not there.

It’s funny how others like to presume why, because it was expensive, or out of our reach – it wasn’t, it was very cheap, cheaper than we will ever be able to travel there again.

I will tell you why we are not there.

Because no one will look after our kids.

This leads to another presumption.

That we must live in a different city to our family.

We don’t, the closest family member is approximately 200 metres  down the road from us.

We just do not have family members that wish to play an active roll in our lives.

They loved to tell us their opinions of our children’s names, or our parenting styles, the love to make comments to others about us, or complain about things that affect them.

But they play no active part in our lives.

It is amazing the Facebook profiles that display family members hugging up to and playing with our children, the ironic thing is that may be one out of a handful of times in which they have done that.

We have a new business, and with any business, it has been a lot of hard work, many days in a row.

People presume we have a team of babysitters on call.

We don’t.

We have taken the kids to events with us on the weekend, kept them out way past their bed time, or tag teamed with each other so one is at home with the kids and one at work.

And others presume that the fact we have a business means we have unlimited supplies of cash to get a babysitter at any price.

We don’t.

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Our business website and details mainly only show Jamie’s name, he was the only one who went to Sydney for the franchisee training course.

The franchise face book page ran hot that fortnight with photos of Jamie’s endless Barista training, and business training. The head of the company was photographed at the end of the training handing Jamie his certificates and gifts.

People think I was not there because I was not interested.

Purely, I could not go because no one would look after the kids.

Others presume that as individuals, we get plenty of “me time”

We don’t.

A recently single friend told me that only now she has become a single Mum, has she got so much more time to herself.

Ironic I know.

You see, like me, she had a husband whom worked long hours, leaving her to have main care of the kids.

Now she is single, people are offering assistance left, right and centre, and her ex has the kids at times too.

She has been on regular nights out, weekends away and even holidays.

I have been a Mum for 7 years and in that time have not had one whole child free weekend.

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Others presume that the fact our daughter has not filled in any names for the form for Grandparents day at school is because her Grandparents are deceased, or live miles away.

They don’t .

She has not even asked to bring any of them along.

They just don’t play a part in her or her brothers life.

People presume because Jamie and I have been together for so long, our journey has been easy.

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It hasn’t.

We have had our hurdles, and a lot of them, but we have stuck it out, and continued to grow.

It hasn’t been easy, in fact sometimes I have to say it has been bloody hard!

I bet you read this post and think I am a whinger.

A thankless/ungrateful whinger.

Perhaps I am.

Despite it all,

The missed chances, the hardships and hurdles.

I have one thing to be grateful for.

For being part of this awesome little gang of 4 people whom I get to call my family.

The way in which we have been treated, the things in which we regret, we get to make sure are not repeated.

While the unfortunate thing is too many people do not play an active part in these two gorgeous children’s lives.

I am so very grateful to be a part of theirs.

And while I moan and complain about the things we do not have in life, I never, ever, not once take for granted the fact that we were blessed enough to be parents to not one but two amazing little beings.

And when the tears are threatening to fall, and the dirty green eyed jealously monster comes out to play, and when I get away from Facebook so I can no longer play the “comparison game”, we take a moment to look at each other, and six simple words are said that make it all worthwhile .

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“At least we have each other”

And you know what?

That’s worth it all.