Putting the pieces back together

It has been a tough few months, but the light is starting to shine again.

Some days I feel like I am taking 3 steps forward, and 2 steps back.

I remind myself that no matter how slow it seems I AM moving forward.

Words always sit with me, they often comfort me in times of need,  I know some people find quotes cheesy.

I love them, even had an exercise book filled with them from my teen years, when internet and pinterest had not yet taken off.

These quotes have continued to comfort me, and below are some that I have used as reminders in recent times.

I was so scared when I fell apart, afraid of how it reflected me as a person, and worried that being diagnosed with depression would be my label.

I am not going to be known as “the lady with depression”, I am going to be known as “the lady who had hard times, but worked through them”.

Already I can see that perhaps falling apart was a blessing in disguise.

A reminder that I am human,

In need of taking a break,

Being a little more gentle on myself.

This quote from Emerson is one of my all time favorites.

It is so very true that no matter what we have been through, or what we are about to go through in life, inside each of us is enough strength to get through our darkest days, to rise above any obstacle, and to sparkle even in what feels like the most dullest of times.

And finally, the last quote, so simple, yet so strong with its message.

Life deals us blows, things happen that we don’t plan.

Sometimes we feel like we are given challenge after challenge.

At the end of the day, the only person who can really save us is ourselves.

As I said before, I still have a long way to go, but then again, who doesn’t?

I will continue to grow, to focus on they areas in life I need to work on, and as I do this, I continue to be thankful for all the words, beautiful, truthful, caring and honest that act as one of the many wonderful things that get me through my journey.

Do words comfort you in your time of need?

What is your favorite quote of the moment?

The young people who brightened my day

It’s been a tough few days, hell if I am honest, it’s been a tough few months, and fighting yet another bout of the flu is not helping.

My day yesterday consisted of cleaning up my sons vomit and nursing him while trying desperately hard not to pass out myself.

I have got pretty much every cold, cough and flu going round this season, I think the toll stress has taken on my body has knocked my immune system down, and I am a bit over it.

However, in falling over for a moment, I do know that I will get back on my feet again soon, maybe not as soon as I expected, but I will get there, and when I do, I will be stronger, I know I will.

As they say, today is a brand new day, and today was a clear example of that.

To start with, my beautiful 6-year-old gave yet another one of her meditation lessons in the comfort of our lounge room.

She has been learning meditation and yoga in brain gym at school, and has been doing demonstrations at home of all she has learnt.

Despite having done extensive meditation courses years ago, I find I am learning so much for my daughter, the gentle soothing reminder in my ear to “breathe in, breathe out”, so simple, yet works so well.

Then we have gentle Mr 3. Noah is heard daily whispering the words “I love you” constantly, he then goes on to say

“When we say I love you to people, it makes them very happy”

and indeed those words make me very happy.

Then I saw this lovely update on the face book profile of a lovely 15-year-old girl whom I used to work with:

those people that have impacted your life in a short amount of time and even though you don’t speak as often you use to, you still look up to them just as much as you ever have, and you know you will for a long time because they are the kind of people that will always stay in your inspirations from everything they have done for you and taught you 🙂

I thought they were such beautiful words, then a message appeared in my inbox from her:

“P.S, my status update is for you!” I was so touched by her kind words, such a beautiful, kind soul whom I feel so blessed to have met.

We had such wonderful conversations the days she was the junior on duty at work with me. I felt when I look at her I see a glimse of me as a 15-year-old in her eyes, then I feel pretty blessed that I do see that comparison, as she is such a wonderful soul.

Further down the track of today’s events, I took the kids to visit Daddy at work.

I let them have a short play in the park outside his work, when suddenly a teenage girl came running through the park, smiling and asking everyone to give her high fives.

As she collected the high fives, some boys who were with her counted them up, turns out she had been dared to get 10 high fives off of total strangers.

Some people just stared blankly at her, refusing to get involved in her game.

I called her over.

“I will give you a high five!”

Over she came, running, and smiling, and we gave each other a huge high five.

Kiara gave her one too, Noah decided against participating.

The group of teenagers left, laughing and talking loudly.

I felt something stay on my face……….

A smile.

To all you young people in my life today,

The ones who lifted me up, who gave me a reason to smile, who made me feel great about myself, to the checkout boy at the shops who initiated a fun, cheerful conversation, to my kids who give me a reason to smile every day,

I thank you.

People like you make me feel happy with the way our world is heading.

As long as we continue to look after each other, to smile at one another, and high five strangers.

I feel we are going to be ok.

The box of memories

We hired a skip bin this week to rid the yard of building rubble and debris created by our never-ending home renovations.

With a little room to spare in it, we decided to have a quick clean out of our shed, also known as “The Black Hole”.

Whilst doing this, I found a blue plastic crate, one I had forgotten I had, filled with treasures and memories.

I took a moment to sit and sort through it, things I don’t ever see me throwing out, things that brought a smile to my face, a tear to my eye, and brought up memories that in some cases I forgot existed.

Here I share some of them with you:

A childhood photo of my big sister and I

A drawing I did of my family in Pre School

My thoughts of what the world be like in the year 2000.

I did this in the year 1988, when 8 years old, got a giggle out of this.

The Bicentennial medallion given to all Australian students in 1988 to mark

200 years since Australia was founded.

Taken approx 13 years old, I was still losing my baby teeth up to the age of 16, as you can imagine, I did not get as many visits by the tooth fairy as others!

I had dreams in my teens of being an actress, whenever I went to the movies I would pretend it was me up there on the big screen.

The closest I got to this dream coming true was getting an audition for “Home and Away” and staring in a few local tv commercials.

A news paper article on my sister Tamina (pictured here with her beautiful dog Kokereka).

The article was titled “Conquering cancer”

Unfortunately a few years after this article was written, Tamina sadly lost her battle to cancer.

A note written to me by Tamina xoxo

A note Tamina’s daughter Jazmine wrote me when she was younger, she is now 15 years old and had a giggle at all her art work when I brought it out.

A  copy of the Eulogy I read at my Grandma Joyce’s funeral.

She was and continues to be one of the most influential people in my life.

There was so much more in that box to look at, photos, letters, poetry memories.

I had forgotten about that blue box.

I am glad I found it, and all the treasures it holds inside.

It was delicately packed up,

Safely put away for another day,

Another trip down memory lane.

Soothing the Soul

There is something about the beach that just soothes my soul.

The feel of soft sand under my feet.

The sound of the waves crashing on the shore.

The sun beaming down and warming my skin as well as my heart.

The beach is my special place.

We are lucky to live in such a beautiful part of the world, a place people travel from all around the world to visit.

My husband is also a beach lover, having spent hours and hours in his teens sailing his boat in the ocean.

We both love the beach so much that we even got married on a beach.

It seems our love has been passed down to our children.

They love to splash in the sea, collect shells, write their names in the sand and make sand castles.

The kids and I set out on an adventure today, we had not originally planned to head to the beach, but it was where we ended up……… where we were meant to be.

Soul soothed now, tank filled, just what we needed.

Do you love the beach as much as me?

Do you have a special place?

What/Where is it?