Losing my shit

So Thursday evening had just been a typical long day, I had made a pot of soup for dinner, hubby is always home late Thursdays, so I am used to dealing with the chaos alone.

Mr 3 had decided to use his bowl of soup to paint the entire top of the table while my back was turned doing dishes. The kids then proceeded to mash cupcakes into the entire loungeroom floor, the type of hard mashing that a broom aint going to sweep up.

The kids were tired and grumpy, like myself. I got them in the shower, had to wash their hair as they had both been swimming that day (on top of the school sports carnival that had left everyone tired as well)

It was late, so I had to blow dry Kiaras hair so she could go to bed. In the process of combing her hair, I found something I had been dreading to see in my 6 years of being a parent…….. a NIT!

Yep, we have been lucky to go 6 years without head lice in this house (we have had an infestation of bird lice thanks to migrating Mina Birds, but that is a whole other story).

So I get out the conditioner, lather her hair up in it, and proceed to comb, and comb her hair out.

We are both exhausted by now, I am thinking of the pumpkin soup I need to clean up, the mashed up cupcakes, the pile of dishes and the washing in the machine that keeps beeping at me.

Meanwhile Miss 15 is on the (broken) lounge chair, heated up, almost passed out by the nasty bug that has been going around our house.

I finally get Miss 5 nit free, re washed and off to bed.

It’s late, I decide no school the next day, it’s the last day of the term anyhow.

I lather up my hair with conditioner as well, “just in case”, hold the phone in the crook of my neck as I ring the school absentee hot line to tell them Miss 15 is too sick and Miss 5 is undergoing nit treatment.

I talk as I work through the mountain of dishes, hubby walking in at the same time, home from work at last.

Suddenly there is a huge noise on the kitchen window. I thought for a moment a bird had flown into it.

I look up…….

There is a cracked egg, sliding down the window………..

It takes a moment to register.

I rush outside, there is eggs all over our front yard (which is enclosed by a 6ft fence mind you), they have narrowly missed my washing.

Hubby creeps up to the fence to peek out, to see if the culprit are still there, his plan is to scare them quietly.

I have no time to think……… my blood is boiling.

With my hair still piled on my head with conditioner, food splattered all over me, exhausted, tired and over this shit, I proceeded to lose my shit.

I stormed out onto the road of our usually quiet neighbourhood, pulling our front gate open, I stood on our front lawn and screamed at the top of my voice

“YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!”

An appropriate quote a friend found for me on facebook

It was partly aimed at the egging culprits, partly just at life in particular.

Not my finest hour, and I immediately looked back to the house to make sure neither of the 2 younger kids had woken up to find Mummy losing her shit in an undignified manner in our front yard.

I did not find the little shits, I have no idea if they saw me, it was dark out there, but I did loose my shit……………………

Then it was time to plod back inside, hose up the cracked egg, do the dishes, hang out the washing, clean up the table, mop the floor……….. and crash.

Losing your shit is rather exhausting.

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2 thoughts on “Losing my shit

  1. Awww poor you! What a bad day! Hugs Hugs Hugs! Considering the circumstances, restraining yourself with a mere “You Mother Fuckers” is pretty awesome. I am sure a much longer string of obscenities would have come out of my mouth and I probably would have run up the street looking for the little crappers. I have been known to lose my shit quite frequently at anyone and everything, from the computer, to the tv, to the car, to the hose with a kink in it, and pretty sure I have said much much worse. I blame genetics. ; )

  2. Aww sweets, I felt like screaming those words myself reading this! As if you needed some little turds hurling eggs at your house after that long and tiring evening. I hope you felt better after some rest. And you know what, for future, I would consider leaving the egg, dishes and mashed cupcakes and just showered and jumped into bed. The crap would’ve still been there in the morning!

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